For the most part, I like to consider myself moderate politically. However, I am very strong in my religious beliefs. The recent Supreme Court ruling to me was a disappointment. But I understand that it is what the law of the land has decided and I live in the land and need to abide by that law. However, I still support traditional marriage. I think it is the best way to raise a family and that traditional marriage stabilizes families and society.
Now I further understand that this is my opinion, and other people do not believe the same things I do. I grew up understanding that I believe differently from other people because my religion is a super small percentage in the nation, let alone the world. (
This site says we are less than 2% of the US). My parents taught me that even though I don't believe the same things other believe, or agree with them, that I can still be respectful and understanding. I can see their viewpoint and not have to agree with it. I like this quote by Rick Warren:
“Our culture has accepted two huge lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone’s lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense. You don’t have to compromise convictions to be compassionate.”
Which bring me to the present. I posted something on Facebook about traditional marriage. I feel that my voice was not being heard and I felt it necessary to take a stand. I tend to not say anything because most things posted on Facebook do not have references. They do not cite the research that has been done, or there simply hasn't been any done. I believe both sides struggle with this. (Both sides in most debates that take place on social media) Also, I feel that most of what is said is simply mudslinging and there really isn't any way to prove what you are saying, you are just name calling to make the other person look bad. (and the only way to sling mud is to get some on yourself, kinda defeats the purpose if you ask me). The truth is, I think that people who support traditional marriage are arguing a different point than those who support gay marriage and visa versa. We can never come to a consensus when we define things differently. I think this is the real problem. Unfortunately, what I posted did not have references, which is one of the reasons I haven't posted anything up to this point. But I did, because I still feel strongly about this point.
I had a friend who took real offense to this. She went on at length at how everything in the video was wrong and how uneducated an opinion it was and was overall very derogatory towards my opinion. I had known I would get a reaction, but I didn't expect it to be so completely dismissive of mine. For a group that preaches tolerance, they sure aren't tolerant if you believe differently than they.
And truth be told, I knew this about their culture. But I have found that people are rarely the stereotype. So I thought that this attitude would have been had by the nebulous "other gay supporters", not from my friend. I was really disappointed that we couldn't respectfully disagree. I would have been the first to admit that there were flaws with the video that I posted and that there are problems with our society that need to be fixed, even be legislation. But I don't believe we have to be disrespectful and rude to do so. We can still recognize someone else's opinion even if we think it is wrong.
What really pushed me over the edge was that she posted on her own page how terrible it was that people are hiding this bigotry behind the word "opinion" and that it isn't actually an opinion. In one post, she totally invalidated my whole lifestyle and view. And the bigger problem is that she is trying to 'educate' me as to why my (not) opinion is wrong. I have never found that the way to convert someone to your way of thinking is to yell at them that they are wrong. That tends to make them hold to their beliefs even more steadfastly. She said she was trying to cut out the bad like a piece of mold on a piece of cheese. I believe the scripture says first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye. I have always believed we should focus on our own failings first. How can I judge someone else's character when I am totally biased by my own?
I believe we can all be compassionate. We can understand each other without compromising our own beliefs. Why can't we sit down together and find a solution that everyone can agree on? Why do people insist on shoving their beliefs down someone else's throats? Why can't I love you and disagree with your lifestyle? I offer you that consideration, please extend the same courtesy to me.
